So I can remember.

I thought about it.

I need to blog.

I took my first blog year and I made it into a blurb book.  The layout isn't exactly how I wanted it....the text is all together for each post...it's not separated with photos in between....but the photos are all there and the text is all there....so it's all good.  You can see it here.

When I was uploading the photos from the blog onto the book, I could see each of the photos flashing on my screen.  It was emotional.  It was this past year of my life....right there in front of my eyes.

So much has changed.

And yet so much is still the same.

I am so very blessed.

From about the age of 12, I have been writing on my calendar.  Every single day I would just jot down what happened that day....where I went or what I did.  It was just a simple idea.  My sister did it on her calendar too.  It wasn't really personal.  It was just a way for me to remember things.

I don't remember things very well.

I can look at the cover of a book and know that I read it....but I don't remember what it was about.

I can watch a movie and half way through realize that I have actually seen it before....but I don't really remember it all....so I can keep watching it.

So, when it comes to life....it can just go by and I will completely forget about what happened.

I just need to be reminded.  All my little notes on my calendars tell me everything.  Sometimes I can remember the entire day just by reading a couple of simple lines about where I went or what I did.  It's amazing.  It makes me remember.

There were a couple of years when I stopped writing on the calendar.  Johanna and Grady were small and Terry was working away....and life became a blur.  And I actually don't remember those years...and I don't have the calendars to remind me.

Then Terry asked me to start writing on the calendar again.  He loved my little notes.  He also loves to get out the calendars and say "remember when....." or "it's been five years since so and so died because we went to their wake on this night".

The other night he said that the blog is so much better than the little squares on the calendar.

And it is.

It just freaks me out a bit when I think about it....it's not just for us to read....anyone can read it.

But I need to tell our story.

So I can remember it.

Brenda